The year is 2003. The album is Take This
to Your Grave. The band is Fall Out Boy.
Everyone sits at home, listening to the
album, getting to track 9.
“Who the hell is Chris?” “I hear he died
in the war.” “I hear he’s some guy they
grew up with.” “I hear he’s a douche
bag.”
All of the above assumptions were
wrong, and still are today. The man is
Christopher Gutierrez, or Hey Chris, as he
is affectionately known. He is just over
thirty, a successful author, and my role
model. It takes a lot for me to admire
someone. This person has to be true to
who they are, amazing at what they do,
and make me want to better myself as a
person. Chris has done all three.
He has written two books, toured the
world, and is currently working on his
third book. Each book focuses on a
to Your Grave. The band is Fall Out Boy.
Everyone sits at home, listening to the
album, getting to track 9.
“Who the hell is Chris?” “I hear he died
in the war.” “I hear he’s some guy they
grew up with.” “I hear he’s a douche
bag.”
All of the above assumptions were
wrong, and still are today. The man is
Christopher Gutierrez, or Hey Chris, as he
is affectionately known. He is just over
thirty, a successful author, and my role
model. It takes a lot for me to admire
someone. This person has to be true to
who they are, amazing at what they do,
and make me want to better myself as a
person. Chris has done all three.
He has written two books, toured the
world, and is currently working on his
third book. Each book focuses on a
different story of his life varying from his time
in the Chicago hardcore band Arma Angelus,
to the day his brother and grandfather died, to
jerking off into socks watching porn in his
apartment while his crazy ex-girlfriend climbs
up the building and appears on his balcony.
No, seriously. I can’t make this up.
“I'm always trying to think of more ways be
more open and vulnerable because, fuck it,
why not? Hopefully someone out there might
take a cue from that and learn to be more open
with their emotions as well, good or bad. The
things we keep inside manifest themselves in
negative ways far too often. Mommy hates
me, daddy touches me turns into alcoholism,
drug abuse and physical abuse...it’s a cycle,
so the question is, how do we break that
cycle? I don't know. I don't. But I do know
what's worked for me...hopefully it might
work for someone else as well.”
in the Chicago hardcore band Arma Angelus,
to the day his brother and grandfather died, to
jerking off into socks watching porn in his
apartment while his crazy ex-girlfriend climbs
up the building and appears on his balcony.
No, seriously. I can’t make this up.
“I'm always trying to think of more ways be
more open and vulnerable because, fuck it,
why not? Hopefully someone out there might
take a cue from that and learn to be more open
with their emotions as well, good or bad. The
things we keep inside manifest themselves in
negative ways far too often. Mommy hates
me, daddy touches me turns into alcoholism,
drug abuse and physical abuse...it’s a cycle,
so the question is, how do we break that
cycle? I don't know. I don't. But I do know
what's worked for me...hopefully it might
work for someone else as well.”
Christopher got his start at writing on
his personal Live Journal, where many Fall
Out Boy fans learned all the dirty secrets
about their beloved Pete Wentz. In late
February 2006, Chris learned information
about Wentz and Chris’ newest ex-
girlfriend that completely destroyed their
friendship. Both parties posted long
responses to each other regarding the
incident in their respective online blogs.
The two have since made amends, but
many fans still hold animosity toward the
“one who sold out Fall Out Boy.”
But it doesn’t bother Chris. “There will
always be hater’s. Its not something I
focus on. I have enough stress in my life
being able to maintain what I have, and
the energy in what I'm doing. I deal with it
by trying to believe in my words.”
Chris has been straight-edge his whole
life. A decision he made that influenced
my own decision, and just one of the
several reasons I admire him. “It’s the
only ‘movement’ that made sense to me.
All while being flexible within its
definition. It has the format of the punk
rock movement. The spirit of the "fuck
you" and the do-it-yourself ethic. Yet
embraces a productive lifestyle and
encourages progress and personal
growth.”
With over 4307 “lurkers” that view his
live journal, as well as several hundred
“anonymous users,” “ [Censoring myself
is] a constant struggle between 'keeping it
real' and 'being responsible with peoples
faith'....I try to balance it all and still be
true to what I really want to say. I see it as
a positive problem though, it makes me
think of things in a different light. Its like
exercise for finesse and tact. I have to
keep in mind that underage girls are
reading the sex stuff and
while that's a big part of my
personality, I certainly wouldn't
want my daughter reading about
some grown man’s penis.”
The story’s entries go
deeper than just “a grown man’s
penis.” Christopher completely bares his
soul to the world. “Lurkers” have been
his personal Live Journal, where many Fall
Out Boy fans learned all the dirty secrets
about their beloved Pete Wentz. In late
February 2006, Chris learned information
about Wentz and Chris’ newest ex-
girlfriend that completely destroyed their
friendship. Both parties posted long
responses to each other regarding the
incident in their respective online blogs.
The two have since made amends, but
many fans still hold animosity toward the
“one who sold out Fall Out Boy.”
But it doesn’t bother Chris. “There will
always be hater’s. Its not something I
focus on. I have enough stress in my life
being able to maintain what I have, and
the energy in what I'm doing. I deal with it
by trying to believe in my words.”
Chris has been straight-edge his whole
life. A decision he made that influenced
my own decision, and just one of the
several reasons I admire him. “It’s the
only ‘movement’ that made sense to me.
All while being flexible within its
definition. It has the format of the punk
rock movement. The spirit of the "fuck
you" and the do-it-yourself ethic. Yet
embraces a productive lifestyle and
encourages progress and personal
growth.”
With over 4307 “lurkers” that view his
live journal, as well as several hundred
“anonymous users,” “ [Censoring myself
is] a constant struggle between 'keeping it
real' and 'being responsible with peoples
faith'....I try to balance it all and still be
true to what I really want to say. I see it as
a positive problem though, it makes me
think of things in a different light. Its like
exercise for finesse and tact. I have to
keep in mind that underage girls are
reading the sex stuff and
while that's a big part of my
personality, I certainly wouldn't
want my daughter reading about
some grown man’s penis.”
The story’s entries go
deeper than just “a grown man’s
penis.” Christopher completely bares his
soul to the world. “Lurkers” have been
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